Yeah I use to have a big crush on you, Use to
by Wish2MakeWishes
Summary: After "act your age", Isabella seemed apathetic about the dating, not her usual excitable self. Ferb & Isabella had become closer over the years & as the time to choose colleges got closer the two were trying to figure out how they could start their lives over to rediscover themselves. Will relationships keep them trapped in their old lives? Rated M just incase swears or steamyness
1. Before I knew

**Hey guys, so this is my first story I'm actually publishing so please review and let me know if I made any errors or just what you think. I'm a huge Ferbella fan and I know it's not a popular ship but Anyway I don't own anything except my crazy plot line. Please let me know what you think.**

**Ferb's point of view**

God I was exhausted. I had been up all night last night talking with Isabella on Skype, well not talking, listening and gesturing. To think this girl who I grew up with, who had the biggest crush on my brother until 9th grade, to think, well that she was growing up. She was leaving and going off to college. I don't know why I was feeling even remotely sentimental, I was going too. I had my plane ticket for England already, four years at good old Camford-on-Oxbury.

We stayed up all night, her going on about how excited she was about college. Debate camp mostly. They were going to start training for the competition they would be having in the fall. That's why she'd be leaving early. That's why I didn't go to bed, I couldn't stand the thought of not seeing my best friend for years, and I think she felt the same way. She had to because she just kept talking even when she ran out of things to say about college, she just kept talking.

"I don't think I will tell anyone I'm going, well not anyone that doesn't already know, I just really don't wanna spend my last day with a bunch of sappy story's about the past and everyone looking at me like they will never see me again, I mean it's just tristate state right? I will still be in town, albeit a big town, but still in town…"

I was silent as ever, _she seemed much more worried than her speech let on, she was worried she'd never see us again, I'm sure she just didn't want to cry in front of everyone or have painful memories dragged back up. It wasn't very long ago that she …_ I looked up and she had stopped talking. I blinked and she knew.

"Ferb I … ok maybe you are right I am worried, I'd love to say good bye to everyone but you know I'm no good at those things. If I could be certain the day wouldn't be a sappy mess then maybe..."

'_With our friends it would always be a sappy mess'_ I thought, but I simply tilted my head and blinked again.

"Uhg your right… you're always right Ferb…"

"Why not do as you are planning now and just leave tomorrow, and then you can come back at Thanksgiving and it won't be sappy but you can still see everyone and It will be normal... well normal for us."

It was logical, it would work and she'd get exactly what she wanted and not have to worry about anything while she was at camp. I didn't want to think of her at school all alone just worrying.

"Oh wow why didn't I think about that? Ferb you always know just what to do, you've always been so smart, smarter than any of us. Speaking of which, what about you? What are your thoughts about college?"

College…ugh. "Well, I will be back in England, which will be nice for a little while." That was code for _'I want to be somewhere that I'm not just Phineas's brother, the quiet one, where I could just be Ferb for a while.'_

"Do you really have to go to England to get what you want?"

How she always knew was beyond me… I shrugged. _Maybe I didn't need to go, but I didn't want to stay and nothing change_. "Even if we went to different schools I feel like that stigma would still be there"

This time she nodded. She was thinking something, what I wouldn't give to peer in her mind like she could do to me. "Is something wrong Bella?"

She looked up, opened her mouth like she was going to say something, then visibly shook off the thought, smiled and tried again. "I bet Vanessa will miss you while you are gone, do you have any plans of how to stay in touch?"

Another shot. She always hit right on the sore subjects. I shrugged. "We haven't per say, she's been kind of flighty lately. We haven't spent a lot of time together either. I feel like she doesn't think it will work out…" just voicing the thought made me sad, like I by acknowledging it was making it real…

"Maybe that's not the case Ferb, hopefully she's just trying to adjust so it won't be such a shock when you're gone." She smiled a half smile. We both knew the odds. Bella was my best friend though, it was her job to say those things, so I didn't argue I just nodded.

"Plus you'll be home during the holidays, you too can reconcile each time you do and be all lovey-dovey or whatever" she laughed a little at the thought.

"Bella… I probably won't be home during those times… I have family in England and if I want to graduate early I will have to work as much as I can." I saw the wheels turning in her mind.

"So you wouldn't be home for thanksgiving?" I shook my head. "Then can we spend the day together tomorrow?"

I was shocked. I mean me and Isabella spent a lot of time together, we went out and did things and we all spent time together as a group but… it was her last day, and she wanted to spend it with me. Just me. Well she didn't say that exactly. I didn't need to jump to conclusions but I couldn't help but feel happy. No that's not right, why did I feel that way? It would be selfish of me to keep her to myself like that, our friends would want to see her, not that I didn't want to have her last day… no I have a girlfriend! Those thoughts were banished years ago. Another reason I would be glad to be out of my brother's shadow…

"Ferb? Hello did you hear me?" I snapped back to reality. "Sorry Bella."

"Geeze Ferb sometimes," she laughed, "How about after I get off work we go get something to eat and maybe you can help me move into my dorm?"

She really did want just me, well not like that, but a day of just us hanging out like the old days. I must have paused too long.

"Well I mean I don't want to force you to do manual labor or anything, and if you're busy or anything I understand, I didn't-"

"Bella I'd love too"

"Geee!" she squealed. Sometimes she could act like she did when she was 12; cute, innocent, and easily excitable. Then she'd be back to 20; cool, reserved, and confidant. I envied that. I feel like I've been stuck just as the same Ferb since that first summer of invention, or at least in the eyes of everyone around us.

"Well we better get some sleep then so we can have fun tomorrow, oh maybe we can watch old cartoons after we unpack, do you want to go to get pizza or buffet? Well maybe buffet would be a bad idea if we have to unpack, oooh what about Italian? No still too much. Geeze what time is it? Oh gosh that late! Ferb time always flies while I'm with you, though I hope it doesn't tomorrow. I guess I better go, sweet dreams, text me ok." She smiled and waved, like she always did at the end of a skype call. She really does ramble when she gets excited.

After we hung up I went to the bedroom and laid on my bed and looked at the clock; 4:15, what an odd time, but what an odder feeling. I may not have been completely honest with Isabella. I knew Vanessa was breaking up with me. I had seen signs; she had been talking a lot with one of her old flames, the sad look in her eyes when we talked, the sadder look from her friends, plus the fact that she hadn't kissed me in at least 2 months. It was just a thing I guess. Of course I was upset but it was like I had been weaned off of her. That intense need that I had, that longing to be noticed by her, it was muted; but I'm sure that happens in all relationships after a while, and we had been dating since I started high school. She had given me something that I needed without knowing, Identity. She gave me the ability to be Ferb. Not one of the dynamic duo, not Phineas's brother, but an individual. And for that I was forever indebted to her. We were more friends at this point than anything else, and even after what I knew was to come within the next few weeks there wouldn't be any bad blood, and in the end I guess that was for the best. Especially givin the feelings I was having now. No it was just late, these feelings were a mix of sleep deprivation and leftover night. Isabella was just a good friend, a great friend who knew me better than anyone, I was just displacing my left over feelings for Vanessa. We were just friends.

I sighed, that depressed me more than I wanted.

Well I was leaving soon, she was leaving tomorrow, nothing was going to happen and if it did it wouldn't matter.

Wait no nothing would happen.

I went to sleep, smiling slightly…

A day to be just Ferb sounded good.


	2. The Big day

**So… I may have had two chapters already written and I'm working on the third, so just let me know what you think. . I am trying not to be super embarrassed. Again first story sorry if it's a bit over the top at times. R&amp;R**

**The Big Day**

The alarm rang, loudly announcing that it was 9:30 in the morning. I hit the snooze as Phineas flew out of bed and ran around the room getting ready for nothing. We both knew that he was going to 'get serious' about college today. Just like he has been going to do since summer began. It was so like him, Phineas didn't deal with definites, he didn't like limitations. One college was just too few, and I guess I understood that, though I didn't share the feeling.

Since I did have something to do today I drug myself out of bed; 5 hours wasn't a lot to work with but it would be enough. After getting ready for the day and eating we went back upstairs to our room. I laid down on the bed and waited. I knew my brother, I knew what was coming.

"Ugh! I'm running out of time, Ferb. I gotta choose a school. Do I stay local or go abroad? Trade school? Art school? Come on, Ferb. Help me make a decision."

Only one way to solve the problem "Get in the booth."

After a few tries some predictable interruptions arose. The boys had come over and of course had their opinions to shine on the situation. I shuddered when Baljeet made his suggestion for Phineas to follow me to college. After a while Phineas decided on the same two he's been stuck on all summer Danville University or Tristate state. I would never understand my brother. For someone who wanted to do so much every day he didn't have a clue as what to do with his future. He could go anywhere and yet both of his choices were so close to home with only the basic Majors. He just didn't seem to care. Of course Isabella was going to Tristate state, and any normal person would think he was thinking of going there to follow her, but such was not the case. He didn't have a clue she ever cared for him. Not that she had ever been one to notice such things either…

Speak of the devil, _"Hey I will be working a little later than I thought, fire side girls are here, and just like I thought all they wanna talk about is Phineas –sigh– see you around 5?" _

"_Sure Bella"_ I was a man of few words but that said all I needed it to. I could wait, though this weird feeling in my chest begged to differ...

"Ha I wish. I am so in the friend zone there." I heard Phineas say.

Of course they were talking about Isabella, though I never knew my brother liked her, he never even seemed to notice her or to send her any signals that he felt anything, or any signals to tell ME he felt anything.

"I don't believe it. Ferb?" Phineas pleaded. I didn't want to say anything, it wasn't my place, I also didn't want to give him false hope that she still cared. Though I guess I didn't know if she did or not… I nodded. Phineas seemed lost and left for a walk, I went to follow him but I didn't see which way he went.

If I was being honest with myself I knew, I'm sure I knew exactly how this was going to turn out but I convinced myself I didn't, that he was just gonna walk around, go home, and morn for a few days of love lost and put off picking a school for another day. But honestly...I knew better.

I found myself near Market Street before I decided to turn around and I noticed a little group of fire side girls had a stand going on. They were selling flowers and I thought it fitting so I bought a small bouquet of dark red and pink ones. Bella would like them, and it's not as if it would be out of the ordinary, she knew I was an English gentleman, all gentlemen buy flowers for the girl they are having dinner with. And this was just for that, right?

I headed back to the house to find the boys sitting on the couch eating sandwiches and watching TV. I put the flowers up in the kitchen and grabbed my own sandwich. A few minutes into the show Baljeet and Buford started talking about the texts he was getting from Ginger.

"The girls want to get Phineas and Isabella together."  
**"**Wasn't that our idea?"

Our idea? Geeze I missed that while I was out, I knew I should have waited. Isabella would not be happy. She said she didn't want today to be about old memories and sappiness. Though maybe she would be happy... she had wanted Phineas for so long even if she had gotten over him, maybe she would still want to give it a shot… That was hard to think of them together after the break down she had had. I was there for her that time, I think I was the only one who even knew it happened anyway. I think that was when we became the best of friends. We were already best friends but going through something like that… that makes anyone closer.

It didn't take long before the girls were there and everyone was running around making a romantic dinner setting. Looked like I wouldn't be able to go out with her for dinner tonight. Needless to say I was slightly perturbed, but maybe this was for the best, maybe she would be shocked, and happy, and swept off her feet by her long lost love, and... Why was I so upset? The girls just kept going on and on about how they would 'have' to fall in love, 'have to' it didn't feel fair to push this on Isabella.

Adyson was so excited "When we get them to come back here and see it and each other, they're bound to fall madly in love like they were always meant to be!" she gushed, to which I barked "You know, you can't force these things."

I must not have sounded as forceful as it felt, because I was brushed off like a warning for 10% chance of rain. Oh well, maybe this will all be for the best after all, I was probably just being overprotective of my best friend. Though over protective felt a lot like another similar green feeling…

As we were finishing decorating I noticed the scene was missing something. I knew where this evening was going so I went inside.

"_Sorry Bella, I don't think I can make dinner tonight. Text when you are done eating and let me know if you still need my help. Hopefully we can still hang out."_

I felt so bad I knew she would be upset and she had no idea about this dinner, and if she was upset by the dinner as well she would know I had a hand in it and she might not talk to me anymore…

At this point I didn't have too much of a choice. I was in too deep.

She replied, _"Is there something going on? Do you know something I don't Ferb? You guys aren't planning a party or anything after what we talked about last night are you? Oh or maybe it's a Vanessa thing?"_

I couldn't win for losing. I didn't respond, either she would get mad and that would be that, or I'd explain that it was their idea and I was just caught up in it. She knew how they were.

_Sigh_

I went back outside with flowers in hand, and as if on cue Ginger and Baljeet were talking about how something was missing. And BAM with the flowers as the center piece this table looked presentable. Now to get the 'love birds' together. Everyone took out there phones as did I only to see I already had a message.

"Ferb honey, we need to talk can I pick you up at your place?"

It was Vanessa, the dreaded message I knew was coming, well with Isabella having her 'date' I was sure I had enough time to eat and get dumped before she would be eating dessert. However by the time I had finished replying that we could grab a bite at the Ukrainian place down town, our entire setup was gone. I swear this yard was cursed. We all decided to set out and look for our targets, who knew they would be so easy to find. We heard everything, and frankly I was confused and shocked. She didn't seem excited, she barely seemed happy. And my predictable brother had decided to go to school with her. So much for Isabella's fresh start… maybe she wanted it this way. But I was still upset with my brother for deciding his future based on a girl. Now Isabella is an exceptional girl but...how did he expect to take care of her? Sure he'd picked a college but what about a major?

Sigh

I sarcastically approached my brother, I was happy the wait was over at least, and he seemed happy about this whole situation, ": So, Tri-State State, huh? Good choice."

"Hey, Ferbs, you ready?" Ah Vanessa right on time to continue this down spiral today has been. I got in the car and hugged her as she kissed me on the cheek.

"Hi, Phineas!"

"Hi, Nessa! Where're you guys goin'?"

"Oh, Ferb's takin' me out for Ukrainian food."

Phineas kept looking at us so I offered, **"**Can we drop you anywhere?"

Why did I even ask, we caught up to Isabella and they kissed, she still didn't seem happy but she said it was 'worth waiting for' so I guess she was just tired… and they kissed again so she must like it enough. Why does this bother me so? She is happy, I will be happy. End of story. The fact that my brother didn't have a clue as to the woman Isabella is now and barely knew the girl she was then, or the fact that he was a as romantic as a paper cut, or that he was a sensitive as a stone… _sigh_… I let the green fade. This was his first relationship, maybe he wasn't the best now but... he would learn. They would be good for each other. This was good. Yeah…

Me and Vanessa left. After two hours of having the inevitable talk and not eating, the oh so familiar phrase _"we can still be friends"_, _"it's not you it's me"_, _"I want you to enjoy college"_, all the things she felt she needed to say to me to make me feel better. But in truth I already knew and was just letting her get it out of her system so she would feel good. We smiled she dropped me off at my house. Phin wasn't home, so I laid down on my bed and turned on my music. Phineas hated my music, he was a Beatles happy go lucky listener, I was a rock'n roll, loud drums, and guitar solos kinda guy.

I looked down at the phone.

Nothing from Bella.

Of course, I'm just Phineas's brother again.


	3. Fresh start?

**I'm super sorry about the delay, with work,school, and college transferring its been crazy, I'm trying to get back into the swing of things. This chapter's uber short but the next one will be pretty long to make up for how short these have all been. I just kinda wanted to explain what Isabella is going through. I don't own anything just my love of this pairing. Promise I won't take as long next time. Please let me know what you think.**

Isabella

After the kiss, after the head spinning, mind numbing, yet oh so unexpected day; I got in my car and I didn't look back. I drove and drove until I got to campus. I tried unpacking only to get discouraged, _'if only I had Ferb here…' _Right. Ferb. My plan today revolved around spending the day with him and that was nowhere close to what I got. The only time I saw him he was driving off romantically into the sunset with the gorgeous Vanessa and dropping off Phineas without even a goodbye. What if I never saw him again? I mean we talked last night about how worried I was about not seeing him, he is my best friend.

I mean that shouldn't bother me right? I know they are going through a rough patch, and they would miss each other, I should be happy they had a chance to do that. Even if it was my last chance to see Ferb this year… Ugh what am I saying? After everything today it was still hard to register, I shouldn't be so worried over Ferb, after all I have Phineas.

Wow just saying that, eight year old me would be dying of ecstasy, but eighteen year old me… Hadn't decided yet. I mean for a long while Phineas had been the dream, so if he was a dream boy then… maybe this would be a good thing. I don't even know why any of this happened, or what we even were now. He told me his feelings and I tried to just shrug it off with the whole _'well that's unfortunate timing'_, but there was still something exciting about the whole thing. I mean I had chased after him for so many years, it was interesting to be chased for once. But is this what I wanted?

Maybe I should be wishing he was here helping me unpack and watching cartoons, instead of Ferb. Maybe I should call him. Yeah right, I don't even know how to feel about him right now, that would just make things awkward. I mean when I stopped having heart eyes for Phineas in high school I thought of all the reasons why we wouldn't work. It's only been four years, could those things of really changed? If they haven't is there any way for either of us to get out of it without ruining our friendship or tearing apart our group? What about my fresh start? What about getting away from this town and this old heartbreak?_ Sigh_. There was only one person who I knew would talk to me honestly about these things, and I doubt with as busy as he was today he was even thinking about it.

I looked down at my phone, no messages from Ferb.

Of course, I'm just the girl head-over-heels for his brother again.


End file.
